Remembering Morgan

Blair, Heather and Ashlyn, Morgan's Sister
A little over two years ago I received a phone call from my friend and former roommate Heather (Miracle) White. I'll never forget that call as she told me that Morgan, her 4 1/2 month old baby, had died in her sleep. Morgan was born with Down Syndrome and was a very sick little girl. She finally came home from the hospital when she was three months old on Fathers Day. I had the privilege of seeing her a couple times and was touched by her struggle to live and the love I saw between her and her Mommy and Daddy.

Each year I join Heather and Blair along with their family and other friends to remember Morgan at the Mile High Down Syndrome 5K Walk at Clement Park to raise money for other local families who are raising some of these special kiddos. As we started the walk three volunteers were standing on the side cheering us all on and they started cheering for Morgan. I almost lost it, but remembered the picture I had in my mind just after her death of Jesus taking Morgan in his arms, sitting her on his lap, and rocking her in a comfy rocking chair. I know that someday Morgan and her family will be reunited. Until then, we walk.

This year Morgan's Miracles joined "Brice's Buddy Bridage" so that the money raised would go to someone who would benefit from the MHDS and from the prizes. The team raised $11,409!!!

My First 5K

I did it!!! I ran my first 5k race this morning.

I was originally signed-up for the James Cooper Memorial race at Chatfield park, but I got an e-mail Thursday night that the race had been cancelled. I couldn't believe it!! They didn't even include any info about why. So, I started searching the interenet to see if there were any other races being held this weekend, September 8 and found one in Golden. The race was described as challanging, but I signed up anyway. The "Golden Gallup" was supporting research for a cure for Pancreatic Cancer. Kind of appropriate since that was what my Grandfather died of many years ago.

My sweet friend Kym and her son Reid came to cheer me on as Steve had another commitment this morning. I really appreciated having them there. The course lived up to its description - challanging. The first 1.5 miles was mostly downhill or flat ground (except for the first 500 uphill ft from the start line). Then the last 1.6 miles was UPHILL!!! I didn't incorporate any hill climbs in my training, so lost a lot of time, but I still finished the race in 38:51 minutes. For my first 5K I think that is an acceptable time. I can't say I was bitten by the running bug. I'm glad I did it, but I think other types of training are better for me. We'll see.

Labor Day

We got out for some fun and a picnic at the park yesterday. Here are a few memories from the day.

He's Growing Up!

Matthew started Preschool last week. His excitement filled our house last Tuesday morning as he kept asking me if it was time to go. Each time I've gone to pick him up he was playing with other little boys and didn't want to leave. He comes home exhausted and falls into bed with little resistance. When I dropped him off this morning his teacher met him in the hall, took his hand and walked with him down the hall. It was a sweet sight seeing him talk with her about his weekend, his little backpack bobbing up and down as he walked. My sweet boy is growing up! I tried to get some pictures of his first day, but he wasn't very cooperative. Fortunately Mrs. Terri (his teacher) sent home some cute photos, but I haven't gotten those scanned yet.

More Birthday Pictures

We had lots of fun yesterday even though most of our invitees were unable to attend Tyler's 1st birthday party. Matthew was very excited that Pastor Scott was here when he woke up from nap time. Here are a few more photos of the fun had by all. As usual I was the one taking all the pictures so I am not in them.

Another Milestone

Can you believe

a year is done?

Our baby boy

has turned "1".

He's standing up

and sitting down.

He's cruising,

cruising all around.

Cuteness!

Just had to post these photos.

Mountain Views

I got to go up to Grand Lake last Thursday for the CVES Technician Retreat. The four hours of driving was well worth the beautiful mountian views I got to revel in for brief time!

Hangin' Out

Matthew and Tyler were enjoying each other's company in this sweet moment. It helped that Tyler was preoccupied with his bottle and wasn't trying to get his brother's toy!

Monkey Boy

"On the way back" is my response whenever we pass this little exercise station along the Brear Creek trail near my house. I've been trianing to run a 5k in September. The path just south of our house is perfect for training, except that we pass the "green park" and multiple exercise stations along the way. Every one we pass Matthew asks if he can climb on it and I tell him that Momma is training for a big race and we have to wait until the return trip to stop. He does pretty good, but he makes sure I keep my word on the way home.

Beauty of the Senses

There is no more wonderful a sensation than a gentle breeze caressing your skin in a mountain meadow. I took the boys to the west side of Falcon Park this morning where we enjoyed some "ice cream for the soul". The 90 degree streak finally broke and in the foothills the whisper of humidity in the wind with the sun on my face was a balm over a stressed out mind and heart. There are days when getting to the hills truly saves my sanity and today was one of them.

I was sad that I forgot my camera because there were some sweet moments when both my boys were reveling in the feel of nature as much as I. Matthew is a boy after his Mamma's heart with his desire to climb on all the rocks. He held up both hands, fingers splayed apart, and told me he was going to climb the pile of rocks this many times! I told him go right ahead and I'd meet him on the other side. Sweet baby Tyler wants nothing more than to walk. He wiggles free of my arms, reaches for my fingers and gets his way as much as he can, whispering "da da" under his breath with each step.

We walked/ran/mosied through the meadow to the other side to see the "castle". Of course we had to stop to pee in the bushes along the way. Matthew is all about nature when it comes to peeing outside. Now that you have that mental image in your mind let me return to our beautiful day. Matthew was also the tour guide at the castle. The rocks walls and chimneys are all that remain of a house that was struck by lightning and destroyed by fire in 1918. He rememberd from our last visit and went around to all the visitors telling them that the house was struck by lightning and was fired. Ah well, at least they won't forget the story either.

Next time I'll remember the camera.

Finally, New Pictures!!!

I got my new digital camera today and took a couple shots. The manual is an inch thick so it will take me a while to fully appreciate what I have, but it is so nice to be able to post photos again.

The baby girl is Alexis Plasterer, daughter of my friend Heather from California. They were here for the day visiting.




Matthew was trying to get his Daddy wet and he got himself in the process - and Daddy to!

Global Warming or Was that Freezing?

Interesting stuff on this topic in the following Canadian websites:

http://www.canada.com/nationalpost/environment/story.html?id=4432a41c-7c52-4b74-934e-f0dac3b2bcb8

http://www.canada.com/components/print.aspx?id=4df175c5-d861-4bb1-8145-4132fcd49870

Pictures Soon

There is hope of seeing more photos of the VanDewater family. I just ordered a new digital camera that FedEx says should be here on Friday. I can't wait!

Miss Potter

I treated myself to a movie tonight and watched "Miss Potter", the telling of the life of Beatrix Potter played by Renee Zellweger. I thought the movie was very well done. I had a particular interest in the film because of an ongoing little game Matthew and I play. We pretend that I am Mrs. Rabbit and Matthew is Peter. I use a silly English accent and we retell the Peter Rabbit story complete with the threat that Mrs. McGregor is going to put him in a pie. Matthew laughs and giggles and we play it over and over.

There are so many themes in that movie that could be pulled out and mulled on, but the one that caught me off guard was the desire to be creative. I wanted to have some means immediatly to take ideas of beauty from my head and have them show up in some tangible form.

I love the way Beatrix turns to her art as a means of expressing a variety of emotion and to either escape, or feel more fully, the reality of her life. Steve and I have lamented occasionally that since having children it is much more difficult to find time to create. For Steve, that means time to write music and for me it is working with my hands - gardening, crochet, cross stitch, quilting, sewing.

What I concluded is that for now all that creative energy is going into caring for my family. My creativity has to be expressed in imaginative play, making a meal from "nothing" in my pantry, seeing animals in the clouds, and yes, finger painting. So during this season of life my boys become the tangible form. They are the clay that gets molded and I'll always think they're beautiful!

Rewards Reap Humility

When we were still in the midst of potty training I was looking for anything I could find that would be a real incentive to get Matthew to use the toilet instead of his pants. For a time I was using mints as the reward for pooping on the toilet.

Last week I decided to go to Subway for lunch. After the sandwich was all made Matthew spied the cookies at the end of the assembly line and, of course, asked if he could have one. I told him no. But the guy ringing us up tries to be the salesman and says "they're freshly baked", as if egging on my sweet child. I looked him in the eye and told him that wasn't fair. He sheepishly agreed. So, to thwart any further conversation about cookies with my son I grabbed a mint from the basket on the counter and handed it to him. Matthew very gleefully replies "oh, a mint, for pooping". I just smiled and nodded as the man started laughing. Children certainly do keep us humble!

The Power of Praise

When meeting with someone last week for some parenting tips Steve and I were challanged to be mindful of the number of times we praise our children during the day. I thought about that and realized that I had been so focused on how "naughty" my son could be that I had neglected to focus on all the wonderful things he does and to praise him for the times when he does listen. My sweet three year old Matthew is seemingly constantly getting himself in trouble through the choices he makes. But when I focus on outrageous praise by blowing the good stuff way out of proportion those are the things that become central instead of the number of times he ends up in time out. (The other part of the equation of course is firm limits on what I will and will not tolerate in his behavior and quick consequences so there is no confusion. )

It's a good exercise for me as I am not very good at giving verbal affirmations to my husband or others. Once again, God knew what he was doing in making me a Mom becuase in order to be a "good" one I can't stay the same. I have to keep learning and growing myself so that I can give my children what they need to learn and grow as well.

Distinguishing Truth from Propaganda

I'm tired. Tired of having to be so discerning every second of every day of what I read on the Internet, hear on the radio or see on TV. I'm tired of the American press getting away with saying whatever they want under the guise of "reporting" the news. I'm tired of having to pick out and unravel the social messages in every sitcom and TV drama. Michael Crichton stated it best when he said "the greatest challenge facing mankind is the challenge of distinguishing reality from fantasy, truth from propaganda". Where are the people reporting the truth about what is happening in Iraq, the real agenda of the US Senate, the reality check on global warming? Why does finding the other side of the story take so much more work?

I'm thankful for the few places I can go to get a different spin, opinion or facts. One I like is
http://www.pearceyreport.com/ It is a great repository of news articles and commentaries that allow me to draw conclusions with, what feels like, a broader view of the story. Perhaps you'll like it as well.

Politics - Dare I Venture???

To be honest, I don't usually get very involved in politics. Partly because I don't like to debate, plus I often have a hard time combating a quick tongued individual to be able to get my point across or feel that I have adequately researched an issue to have a strong opinion. But I guess I've decided to come out of hiding. Plus I have read a few paragraphs in the news lately that I strongly disagree with or couldn't believe how the individual was talking out of both sides of his mouth with no awareness of the contradiction. Here are a couple examples.

The first is from a Yahoo News story:
"Edwards, wearing a purple tie to match Sojourners' signature color, promoted himself as the candidate most committed to the group's mission of fighting poverty. He said he doesn't feel his belief in evolution is inconsistent with his belief in Christ and he doesn't personally feel gays should be married, although as president he wouldn't impose his belief system on the rest of the country." Read the rest of the article.

Do you read what I read??? Why the separation between private and public? Why is this dualism so widely accepted?

The other is from The Washington Post:

"I want a president who believes in empirical fact, whose understanding of spirituality is complete enough to know that faith is "the evidence of things not seen" and who knows that for things that can be seen, the relevant evidence is fact, not belief. I want a president -- and it's amazing that I even have to put this on my wish list -- smart enough to know that Darwin was right." See the rest of the article here.

Darwin was right??? What about Intelligent Design? It is amazing to me how much Darwinism has influenced every element of life.

That's all I dare to put out there for now, but I have a feeling it won't be the last.

Happiness In Red and Black

A couple years back my mountain bike was stolen out of our garage, presumably in broad daylight. Thanks to craig's list I found a practicaly brand new bike for a great price along with a double kid carrier. It's great to go bike riding again, especially when all four of us can go together. Our little extrovert Matthew says "hi" to everyone we pass and gets quite perplexed when they don't respond. Sweet boy, he just loves to talk to people.

All Those Boys

Kym is a dear friend who's boys are close in age to my own. We attended Treyton's dedication a few weeks ago at their church. She sent me this photo.

Matthew (3) , Joan, Tyler (8 mos), Reid (2), Kym, and Treyton (5 mos)

Five Alarm Day

There are days when I wish I could go back to bed and start over for another chance. Today is one of those days! I woke up this morning to find that Matthew had gotten into the freezer and retrieved a bag of frozen blueberries. I would have been fine with that if he had just eaten them. Instead, I found them strewn across the kitchen floor. Now you may me thinking, no problem, just clean them up. But, you may not know that the previous owners installed carpet in my kitchen so I have ground in blueberries in my kitchen carpet - not so easy to clean. The rest of the morning went similiar. Tyler pulled a candle stand over on himself, Matthew decided to poop in his pull-up instead of on the toilet, and on and on.

After taking many deep breaths I ending up loosing it and yelled at Matthew to get in the car - we needed to get to the chiropractor. Of course, that meant that he was a demon child at the chiropractor because he was mad at Mommy and let me know about it through his behavior.

Matthew and I agreed that we got a bad start to the day and I asked him what we could do about it. He decided that a cookie would help him feel better. They sure learn early! He apologized for not being very nice to me.

Naptime today meant a few moments to recover and on to cleaning the kitchen floor. Here's hoping that a good nap will change some attitudes!

Global Warming???

I must admit to a very confused and skeptical state of mind related to the topic in my title. I have listened to the media hype and Oprah's Green Day guests talk about the doom of our planet if we don't change our light bulbs. But, I have to admit that it just hasn't added up in my brain. So...I started digging, trying to find out if there was evidence to back up the claims and was surprised to find numerous books, articles and rebuttals to the "evidence" of global warming. Here is one article I would recommend or just do a quick search on The Politically Incorrect Guide to Global Warming and Environmentalism. Check these out and decide for yourself. Don't let the media decide for you!

Pictures

Well....my digital camera bit the dust and I'm not sure when I'll get a new one. So in order to post photos I have to get film, take pictures, get them developed, and then scan them into my computer. Interpretation - you might not see photos for a while. I'll let you know.

Reflections

Life is really quite amazing - even more so when, as a Mom, I get a few minutes to just sit and reflect. Of course that only happens late at night when my Husband and two boys are fast asleep in their beds and I am left to roam the beautifully silent house all by myself. It is a delightful time for me, that is until my eyes blur and I can no longer read what I'm typing.

I am amazed by the people, circumstances, or things that are placed in my life through or by which I learn. The amazing part is that each one serves a purpose and rarely am I aware of the reason.

Today though, I was.

What was the reason?

To strengthen my resolve or certainty in what I believe and want to defend or hold on to.

Who were the people?

First there was my children's Pediatrician, then a birth story of a woman I don't know, and then a friend in Germany.

What are those things?

1. Complementary and Alternative Medicine
2. Natural Childbirth (did you know that 30.2% of all births in the US were C-sections in 2005 - by the way, that comment is in no way a reflection on the Moms who had a C-section - it is a much bigger issue with the medical community) see http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/06facts/births05.htm
3. Knowledge of God - through understanding the world around me

But more than that, my resolve is to be more me. (That looks funny in print) To figure out my passion(s) and set some goals that lead to growth and a bigger impact in my world. The problem is time and energy. But when I read or hear about women who make a difference through their lives they always seem to find enough of both to make their dreams a reality. So perhaps I need to dream bigger (or go to bed earlier) so I have more energy to make it to the finish line. We'll see how this all unfolds.

What is your Worldview??

Can you answer this question? If not, or if you want to know more about worldview, I would highly reccomend a book titled "Total Truth" by Nancy Pearcey. Usually I read fiction or parenting books, but the connection between this book and a course I took in college about the life and work of Francis Schaeffer reeled me in and it has been worth reading every page. Nancy Pearcey gives an insightful background to the development of modern thought and philosophy in politics, religion, science and social issues. I am about halfway through the book (it's long), but my brain is swimming with the application of the ideas she writes about. Do you want to know how to defend what you believe or better understand how our culture got to where it is today? Then read this book!

http://www.gnpcb.org/sites/total.truth/
http://www.pearceyreport.com/

Bath Time

Tyler is old enough now that he and Matthew can take baths together. They were having lots of fun the other night.

Who Does He Look Like??

I dug out some of my baby photos to compare to Tyler. I think he looks like me - what do you think!?!

Easter

We were quite shocked to wake up to falling snow Easter morning. The short sleeve shirts I bought for the boys seemed a bit out of place, but I just put on some sweatshirts and coats and they were fine. We slipped and slid to church, but were glad we made it. I always love Easter Sunday. I made a lamb roast for dinner and Matthew actually ate some, along with his artichoke. Ever since the egg hunt Matthew keeps asking me to hide the eggs again. I obliged him once then he said he was going to hide them. Instead he sat down and ate all the candy when I wasn't paying attention. Oh well, what can you do?!?!

The Pain of Relationship

There is no suffering like the suffering involved in being close to another person. But neither is there any joy nor any real comfort at all outside of intimacy…
-Mike Mason, The Mystery of Marriage

I like this quote. We have been struggling to be kind and compassionate towards one another in the last few weeks. Steve has been down and out with a gastro-intestinal bug for three days and he is really not fun to be around when he is sick. The good part is that we are learning, slowly but surely, to communicate better about the real reason why we act as we do and to grow together because of it. So, while the circumstances of life are not always pleasant I am grateful that God allows us to go through them - once on the other side.

March Photos

Spring has sprung - we should have tulips soon.

My smiley boy!
The double jog stroller.

On the way to the park - Matthew always has to climb up and over two or three times.

Just Doing Life

I decided it was time to end my silence and post a new blog. The lack of posting was simply that life has been all too consuming lately and there hasn't been much of interest to report.

I did get a weekend away at a Women's Retreat in Colorado Springs. The speaker was great, I got a couple hours at Garden of the Gods all by myself, and I got to sleep two full nights without having to get up to check on a child. Each time I called home Steve sounded calm and in control so I was able to really relax - what a treat!!

Otherwise we have still been fighting sickness. I spoke too soon with my last post. Matthew got sick with the same nasty cold Tyler had and also got an ear infection. Then Matthew got the stomach flu, then I got the stomach flu, then Matthew got the stomach flu. Needless to say, we are ready for a break from viruses invading our house.

I finally got sick of my baby fat and got serious about weight loss. I've lost 8 pounds in the last two weeks and am fitting back into some of my pre-baby clothes - it feels great! My birthday present to myself was a double jog stroller. I love being able to go for walks with both boys. Matthew chooses between the school park, yellow park, or green park and off we go. I always encourage him to run on our way back - wears him out and he takes a long nap!!!

Tyler is eating three meals a day at 7 months old. He's a tank! He loves his food and doesn't sleep through the night without all three. He is now eating potato, avacado, squash, peas, cauliflower, and quinoa. Tomorrow we'll try brocolli.

Steve has been doing some side electrical work. He has another 50 hour job coming up. Hopefully we'll get to do some of the re-finishing/re-modeling projects we want to do this summer.

Well....that is the extent of our lives right now. Hopefully we'll have some fun stuff to report soon. We got a flat Stanley in the mail and we need to get him to some interesting places to report back to Vanessa in Maine.

Cheers!!!

We Survived!!

We have finally rounded the corner on sickness at our house. Poor baby Tyler got a nasty cold that developed into an ear infection. AND during the two and a half weeks that he was sick he got his first two teeth. Needless to say we have had many sleepless nights around here. It is taking a concerted effort to get Tyler back in his sleeping/eating routine.

My sweet baby turned 6 months on Feb 17 - the day before he got sick. The sickness delayed the introduction of solid foods so we just started that new adventure this past Friday. He's doing pretty good - I have to get some of those great food on the face pictures to share. He is just so cute!! I forgot how many faces they can make when trying new food.

I'm very tired, but Matthew and Tyler keep me smiling, especially when they get to laughing at each other.