The Opposable Mind

A while back I found the following quote on a fellow bloggers website:

"The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two

opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the

ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that

things are hopeless yet be determined to make them otherwise."

-F. Scott Fitzgerald

I sent the quote to my boss as it fit a situation at work we were dealing with at the time. Just a few days later the book The Opposable Mind by Roger Martin, in which the above quote was written, showed up on my desk - my very own copy. It wasn't until this past weekend that I got to dive into the book and couldn't put it down.

The subject matter is all about learning a different way to think, titled "Integrative Thinking" by the author. I have found it stimulating and challenging. In business we often have to decide between two options, an either/or scenario. The author says, figure out how to do "and" instead of "or" and the possibilites are much greater.

The author gives some inspiring examples of integrative thinkers and what they have achieved. I think I find this book stimulating because I often find myself in the place of feeling like I am a dichotomy. On the one hand I love being a Mom and want to mother my boys to the best of my ability. Yet, I am pulled to the other side of me that loves a professional career. I am looking for the "AND" between my two sides. For now that means working part-time while my boys are young so I can be with them to shape them and give them a solid start in life. Later, maybe I will have the opportunity to expand my professional career and still care for my family. Or maybe I can do both now.

Happy Easter

I love Easter - I think it is my favoriate holiday. There is such a feeling of hope and victory around this "holy" day. Spring is around the corner and color is coming back into the landscape very soon. We can start shedding the heavy layers and find our own ways to blossom into this new season. My boys are able to play outside more without having to get on LOTS of clothes and I hear more birds singing.

I also love the music of Easter. We decided to go to Denver First Church of the Nazarene for service and Steve and I were both holding back the tears as we listened to and joined in with great songs like "Via Dolorosa", "He's Alive", "Were it not for Grace", and many more favorites. There was a full choir and orchestra and the joy on so many of their faces mirrored our own. We left feeling refreshed, knowing that God had met us there.

The boys love Easter too. Matthew is starting to understand that the day is about more than just candy, but he sure loves his easter egg hunt. I tried to get some photos before they got messed up, but Tyler got into the water.Matthew was too busy eating jelly beans to care about getting his picture taken!

Time Change

I was dreading this time change and somehow had it in my head that the boys would be up early, like 6 am. I have been pleasantly surprised that 3 out of the last 4 mornings I've gotten to sleep until 8 am because the boys slept that late!!! I LOVE to sleep late in the morning prefering to stay up late instead of having to get up early. So this adjustment period has been like an ice cream sunday for the soul! I like pleasant surprises.

Another Year Gone

With each passing birthday I am more and more aware that the years pass so quickly. There have been birthdays that were significant like turning 21, then 30 then the years of my children's birth. This year wasn't too traumatic and it was actually kind of special since I got to celebrate my birthday with my parents for the first time in 19 years.
Our tradition growing up was that we got to choose our favorite dinner and type of cake we wanted Mom to make. Mom seemed to be eager to continue the tradition when she was here. But, I had gotten in my head that I wanted a fruit tart instead of a traditional birthday cake. I studied one in the Whole Foods bakery case and decided I could make it myself. So, once I get an idea in my brain I'm like a dog on a bone and have to get it done - myself. I put dinner in the crockpot in the morning and finished the fruit tart by the time we were ready to eat. I was quite proud of the final result, although I'll change the filling recipe next time.

Fun Was Had by All!!

Grammie and Grandpa Harriman came to visit this week and we kept busy. We went for a hike, climbed trees, played by the water, did puzzles, Grammie went with Matthew to Preschool, painted a clown face and much more. They left today and I think it was with mixed feelings - sad to go, but glad to get back to some quiet!

Motherhood Bath

We went to church last Saturday night as we normally do and enjoyed some great worship and got to hear our good friend Brad Ellgen speak. After the service I went to get our kiddos then went back upstairs to see some friends we hadn't seen in quite a while and wanted to show off Tyler and Matthew. As I was standing there talking to Mark I realized with horror that Tyler was starting to throw up on me. I quickly said "Excuse me" and rushed to the bathroom. When I started to inspect how widespread the damage was I realized that he had given my new black purse/bag a bath and I didn't dare reach my hand inside. As well as getting it down my back and on my jeans. After getting both of us cleaned up and calmed down we went to find Steve and Matthew and we left - without getting to say goodbye to the friends. Oh well, I guess it goes with Motherhood! Poor Tyler, at least at this age he doesn't get embarrased.

Countdown

Remeber the 80's song "Final Countdown"? Well imagine a four year old boy running around the house singing that song. Grammie and Grandpa H are coming for a visit next week and Matthew is so excited. We made a paper chain to count the days.

Table Talk

This is where I found the boys one morning when I was trying to get ready for work. Apparently chairs were not necessary!

Matthewisms

Quotes from Matthew today:



"You're cracking my butt." I'm sure he meant to say "You're cracking me up". Apparently he doesn't realize he already has a crack.



"Does God change into Spiderman?" Then we had a "theological" discussion about who God is.

Grammie H Sends Warmth

New mitten sets and PJs are keeping these boys toasty this winter!

Fabulously Silly

Steve and Matthew love watching the Super Heros on U-Tube. Tyler decided to join in the fun and cause trouble!

Anestrophic Anticipation

My good friend Kym sent me this phrase and definition when we were discussing Into the Wild and it really got me to thinking.

Anestrophic Anticipation Definition: No sense of catastrophe. You walk through the valley of the shadow of death and you fear no evil – not because you are fearless but because you have no awareness of what may happen. Quoted from Coming Into the Country by John McPhee

That makes me go Hmmmm. I'll have to think about that for a while. The first question that comes to mind is which is better, to know the the possible threats and have to control your fear or relinquish the fear, or to be niave and remain innocent? Because the dangers may materialize and then again they may not.

How many things do I choose not to do because I do now the possible dangers? Is it better to remain safe and risk free, or should I step out more and just try to be as prepared as I can?

Then I think of my kids - they are constantly in "anestrophic anticipation" and it is my job to point out the possible dangers and protect them from the potential harm. And what about the spiritual world - what does God protect us from that we have no idea of? Wow, that word and definition really set my mind spinning.

Wild Adventure

I finished reading Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer and there is one section that I've been mulling over in my mind.

The book is about the life of Chris McCandless who decided to spurn societal norms and follow his own path. He decided after multiple adventures that his path was leading into the Alaskan interior where he wanted to survive off the land near Mt. McKinely. Four months after his mecca trek to "freedom" his decomposed body was found by a moose hunter - he had starved to death.

I don't propose in the least that I understand this man or his quest just from reading a 200 page book written by someone who never actually spoke to Chris McCandles. I will say that I came away with a sense that Chris was running from a sense of loss, but also desperately seeking meaning to life. The fact that he starved to death is tragic, especially considering the nearness of food and help available to him had he been in the possesion of a topographical map. And that, I guess, is my biggest hang-up with his quest. He seemed foolhardy in his belief that he could survive the elements with so little preparation and equipment.

My opinion aside, the section that I've been mulling over is about the adventurous spirit. The excerpt is from a letter written by Chris to his friend Ron.

"...I think you really should make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previoiusly never have thought of doing or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventerous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living sprit is his passion for adventure."

My mulling has gone in circles at times.

On the one hand I yearn for adventure again. I miss the spontanaeity afforded to the single life when I could, seemingly whenever I wanted, choose to wash my cares in the mountain stream or loose my worries to the meadow breeze, surrounded only by the beauty of nature and the smell of pines. But, I don't miss the lonliness of those times, for even Chris McCandles wrote in the margin of one of his books "happiness only real when shared."

I also am struck by the last sentence "the very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure". I would argue that the passion for adventure is the pull that God has placed in the heart of every man to know the freedom of a life wrecklessly abandonded to knowing Him and doing His will. Adventure would be wonderful for a time, and I am willingly led into adventure whenever I do get the opportunity, but adventure without relationship and a larger purpose seems shallow.

So I wonder...
Have I become "too conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism" that I am fearful to change the circumstances in my life, to find the missing adventure; or am I wiser and more responsible in my choices?

Am I seeking to be lost in the adventure of knowing God, willing to surrender my own will to the will of the one who loves me unconditionally?

Am I teaching my children to love life to it's fullest - to find the right balance between adventure and responsiblity?

Am I teaching my children healthy communication (something I don't think Chris learned) so they can handle the hard conversations in life?

I think I'll keep mulling.

No Nap - Day 3

Help!!! Matthew just decided out of the blue that he no longer needs a nap. He went from taking two hour naps to NOTHING! It is a struggle to get him to stay in his room for at least an hour and half just so I get a break. I have been so used to him being a really great sleeper for the last four years that this sudden change is throwing me for a bit of a loop. If you have any suggestions I'm all ears!

Matthewisms

"Mommy, let's make a tent!" as he climbed into my bed this morning. He brought his flashlight and said "my flashlight is magic". I asked him what it did. "It turns into an action figure."

"Mommy, I need my morning cup of coffee." (coffee = warmed up rice milk that I froth and add a little sugar). Then while he was sitting at the table drinking his "coffee" he says "I need a newspaper." The funny thing is I rarely drink coffee at home and neither Steve nor I read the paper so I have no idea where he got this.

"There's the moon." Yes, I reply and it's almost full. Then Matthew asks "Does it have cryptonite?" (Always the superhero)

Matthew here's your apple. "I'll eat after I finish my Kung Fu lesson."

What have I been up to??

I've been quiet for a couple weeks as I've been busily organizing and re-evaluating various aspects of my house and heart. The organization comes easy to me, I just don't always take the time to do it the way I want to. This is what I've been up to:

1. I finally cleaned out my storage room so that I could walk in there and access the closets and shelves.
2. I have a pile of baby and maternity stuff to consign at a local shop and the rest was taken to Goodwil (or will be, the back of my car is still waiting to be emptied of another pile).
3. I went through paperwork on my desk and Steve's desk and starting preparing for taxes.
4. I re-organized my stationery - vowing to write more personal notes.
5. Next I'll tackle the boys' closets to see what can be moved around to facilite easier room cleaning. I already got rid of some toys before Christmas and Matthew's birthday.

This is what remains on my list:
1. Research school options for Matthew
2. Research Natural Childbirth Education training courses
3. Clean carpets
4. Finish the process of Estate planning.
5. Repot my house plants

It is good to clean out, both literally and metaphorically. To purge my house, mind, and heart of the excess stuff that gets cluttered there and impedes efficiency and effectiveness. I find it much easier to organize stuff than to face the condition of my heart before God and the areas of my relationships with family and friends that needs work. I look forward to 2008 to see how God will work on all these things to shape my life and the life of my family to honor Him.

Happy New Year

I've gotten three viruses in the last three weeks. I'm tired of being sick! Unfortunately I was sick today, but found the energy to help Matthew make his gingerbread train like I'd promised.

Making Pizza

Matthew loves to help me make pizza. The hard part is getting him to just knead the dough, not eat the dough.

Winter Wonderland

We went for a walk down to the elementary school to play in the snow. The boys hats were made by Grandma H.

Merry Christmas

We had a beautiful white Christmas this year - only the 13th in 106 years. The snow started Monday night and snoed all Christmas Day. Unfortunately I was so busy with the kids that I didn't get any photos of us opening gifts, but I did get a few after.

Matching PJs made by Grandma H.

One of his favorite toys. The robot lights up and talks.